Ashes to Glory

I must admit. I have seen one of the most fascinating event made a group of human beings. Today is the first race of the Formula 1 2009 season. We all know Formula 1 is the pinnacle of motorsport. Everyone competing in F1 are either the fittest athletes, brainiest engineers and the smartest constructors. (though not smarter than me.)

Throughout the years there had been plenty of drama, especially for the pass 3 years. We have seen how friendship cum team mate of one team broken down to become one of the worst enemies of modern time in motorsports. We have seen the largest aftermath of an espionage involving two of the best F1 teams in the world. That resulted in McLaren handling 500million Euros to the FIA as punishment, which escalated the rivalry between Lewis and Fernando. We had seen, too how what seemed to be an achievable task yet fortune fools them away from it.

But nothing is as brilliant as today in the Australian Grand Prix 2009.

More than a month ago, Honda announced a shocking news that they’ve decided to leave Formula 1 thoroughly and no longer involve in F1. That leaves the England based team without an owner, without financial backing, without an engine supplier and had no chance to test their cars. Their situation had gone from bad to worse.

Not scoring any point during the 2008 season was already bad enough. Then came along Honda’s exit, the drivers were at the brink of announcing their early retirement. The English team of nearly 700 employees were about to loose their jobs. All these during the economic crisis. How worse could it get.

4 weeks ago, just before the deadline of team registration, they  official announced that they had a new owner. They are now called the Brawn GP. Ross Brawn, former constructor for Ferrari and Prost F1, is the new owner of the team.

A week later, they unveiled their new car, white with yellow stripes powered by a Mercedes engine. Despite the financial crunch and the lack of testing, they topped the time sheets during the first official test session organized by FIA. The same sheet-topping timings were obtained in the second test session a week later.

That was astonishing feat. Not long ago they were at the brink of  dismembering. Suddenly, they became the largest threat in the toughest motorsport league. There was light at the end of tunnel for them.

Saturday at about 4pm Australian time, the qualifying session was dominated by the Brawn GP cars. Jenson Button and Rubens Barrichello were placed 1st and 2nd of the grid. That alone had sent chills to the opponents and delight to its owner and new found sponsor, Virgin Group. Virgin Group has just signed the deal a night before the qualifying session.

Today, the race was expected to be intense. The two Brawn GP at the front are expected to seize this opportunity to carve out the first win for the team.

2 hours later, everyone at Brawn GP celebrated their first 1-2 victory in their lives. 4 weeks ago, all their plans had been put on hold due to the exit of their owner, Honda. The future seemed pitch black for  everyone in the team. It seemed as to be a hopeless future.

Today, it was a maiden victory. A classic story of a team that risen from the ashes. Of what seemed to be a bleak future, they carved themselves a future of fortune.

Ross Brawn had earned himself a reputation, a legend. He, the man who crafted the success of Michael Schumacher and Ferrari, came and performed his Midas’ touch, turning the ash into glory. A  dominating victory that even Ferrari and McLaren unable to challenge. A truly celebrated man he is now.

This event touched me a little. A series of unfortunate events had made them stronger and thanks to Ross Brawn, they have find their long lost fortune. I must say this is the best show on earth. Even reality shows such as American Idol, Big Brother and not even Amazing Race can match this symbolic event.

The true grit and faith made me think and realize that what I saw this afternoon is what is known as the human will power, the spirit of ‘never say die’.

Absolutely brilliant.

Do You Know How To Say ‘NO’?

A: Can i hit you in the head?

B: NO…

A: You said yes…i’m gonna hit you!

B: NO!! I said NO!

A: You said YES.

B: I said NO!

A: you said YES.

B: I’VE SAID NO~~~~!! Do you know how to spell N, O, NO! Do you know how to say ‘NO’?! Do you know how to listen ‘NO’!!!

A:………no

True Colours of Colour

This seems to be black colour. But it’s NOT. The truth behind this ‘black’ colour is actually WHITE colour. Try take a light and shine on it. It will show it’s true colour, WHITE.

 

This seems to be white colour. But it’s NOT. The truth behind this ‘white’ colour is actually BLACK colour. When you switch of the lights it will become black.

 

So, colours can lie. You need to investigate the true colour behind the colour.

 

To relate this case, black people are actually white people. The Africans and Indians are not black people. They are actually white people. We cannot call them black people because when they are under the sun shine or being shine by light, you can see traces of white.

 

On the other hand, white people, which is the more dominant race, aren’t white people. They are actually black people. We cannot call them white people because when there is no light, they are thoroughly black. So, we should call them black people instead.

 

I am smarter than an apple. Therefore i am the smartest man on the flat surface of the earth.

The Powers of Sex

There have been people asking me about my obsession with Sex. So many of my posts are touching the Sex topic. Why? Are you guys still very taboo with it? Or is it a very powerful activity that strikes the conscience of you readers of an apple brain? An attention grabber for the lay-apple-men sake you may realize.

 

You see, I am not obsessed with sex. I’m not a maniac. Sex is boring. However, after been through so much study and observation, i realize that sex is an ‘obsession’ with you readers, ‘MANIAC’. I realized that the sex topic is a very powerful, too.

 

Let’s take Malaysian politicians for instance. We pay the taxes for politicians to address and discuss about our problems in the Parliament. Instead, all we heard on Live telecast was loads of sex themed words. You can hear words like ‘bocor’ or ‘leaking’ and other sexist remarks that would come out from their sorry wise looking cunt faces. Those are the words that would strike the intensity and up the heat.

 

Now, we look at other instances. FUCK YOU. A very revoking word. You could feel the insult of the word. The word fuck should be replaced with ‘intercourse’ as i have mentioned in this post. It’s a very beautiful word It can be used in many ways and it doesn’t matter in what way it is being used, it will have its profound effect to the listener. Now I’m ‘complimenting’ you, you are INTERCOURSINGLY UGLY.

 

You see, Sex is a very attractive and powerful message carrier. People can use it to carry out their messages with upmost effect. For example, I want to say that you are an idiot. I would say you are a dickhead. Calling you an idiot, you can chose to ignore it thoroughly. But calling you a dickhead, you can somehow feel your guts kicking, eager to fuck me up and tie me up on my bed so that you can drip some hot wax all over. I won’t get horny with that. But please, i’m not a gay.

 

On top of that, Sex is very interesting. Who won’t have the urge to know about, try it, and indulge into Sex? When you eavesdrop at your colleagues talking about  the girls that they intercourse with, you will have the urge to know about and indulge into the fantasies no matter how well brought up you are. You will think about how you gonna sex your partner up even if you believe in sex after marriage. Sex is overwhelming. That’s how sex crimes come about.

 

I must praise the prostitution profession. It is the oldest occupation in the world. It is also one of the most profitable jobs in the world. It will guarantee you a lot of pay, given that you are not ill-treated by your employer like the prostitutes in India.

 

So, believe into sex. It gives you pleasure, gives you power, gives you urge that you can’t resist, gives you satisfaction and enjoyment, gives you power and most of all, gives you lots of profit.

Sex rules.

I am the smartest person on the flat surface of the earth.